17 Things

In this Issue:

• Important: WFU Police receive reports of fraudulent calls to families about student arrests
• 17 things I hope our students know, or do, while at Wake
• Emails from the Office of Residence Life and Housing

Important: WFU Police receive reports of fraudulent calls to families about student arrests

Today we sent a message to all currently-enrolled families (i.e., P’23-26) about a fraud scheme that we want you to be aware of:

“Wake Forest University Police has received information regarding a fraud scheme in which the non-emergency number for WFU police was spoofed. The caller tells a parent or family member that their student has been arrested and bail bond money must be sent using Venmo.

If you receive a call from Wake Forest’s non-emergency number (336-758-5591) where the caller requests that you send money to resolve an issue, the story can be compelling. Do not send money.” Read the full message.

17 things I hope our students know, or do, while at Wake

Many years ago I read an article about the 17 things one mother wished her son would know on his 17th birthday. It’s a great article and a great concept – so I encourage you to think about this and adapt it for your students’ next birthday (e.g., “21 things I hope you know as you turn 21” etc.)

Inspired by this mom’s article, I thought about 17 things I hope our students know (or do). Here goes.

1. You get out of Wake what you put in it, so bring your best self to everything you do. Academically, it means keeping up with classes and assignments, being prepared, being responsible. Socially, it means being a good citizen of this campus.

2. Be curious. College is likely to be the only 4-year stretch in your life where you have the luxury of being 100% self-centered – what I mean by that is not that you are selfish, but that you have the luxury of being able to think about who you are, how you feel, where you stand on all sorts of issues. It’s time devoted totally for you to learn new things, to stretch and grow. Take advantage of it.

3. Get to know your faculty (and ideally some staff too!). You should strive to know a lot of your faculty of course, but be sure to find at least one faculty member (or administrator) you can go to for academic issues, personal advice, etc. The faculty here care and they want to know you – so go to office hours and forge those relationships. (PS – be especially kind to the folks who work on your hall, serve you food at the Pit, etc.  They have tough jobs.)

4. Don’t look to your parents or family members to solve your problems. Their problem solving skills are already well-honed and those muscles don’t need to be stretched; yours do. Learning to find your own solutions to problems is what helps you learn to deal with whatever life throws at you, and gives you confidence to know you are smart and capable. It’s fine to vent to your parents or family members about problems, but tell them “I am just venting – I am not asking you to solve this. I need to do that myself.”

5. Your choice of major does not determine your outcome in life. There are very few jobs that admit (or exclude) someone solely based on their major. If you fall in love with [insert major here] and are excited about that course of study, go for it with all you have.

6. Mental health matters, so tend to it as carefully as you would your grades or your homework. I’d venture to guess that nearly everyone in their 4 years here has moments of anxiety, depression, concern over a friend who is exhibiting troubling behavior. Don’t go that alone. Seek out support from the University Counseling Center, Student Health, the Chaplain’s office, your RA, a trusted adult.

7. Physical health matters. Get enough sleep, make nutritious food choices, exercise.  And be moderate and balanced in all things.  And speaking of….

8. Be careful about overindulging in alcohol. I say this for your physical safety and also because you don’t want to waste every weekend being drunk and hungover. I can say this as the old lady of 52 that I am: you will never, ever, ever be as free of life’s responsibilities as you are now. You are young, on a beautiful campus and you have every opportunity available to you. Don’t waste those opportunities by spending all your time partying and recovering.

9.  Learn to be comfortable in your own skin, even if that means you aren’t doing what you think everyone else is doing. You are going to be happier being you than pretending to fit in to some ideal that doesn’t feel right for you.

10.  Look out for your friends and classmates. Be attentive to someone who might be struggling. Offer them kindness and support, but also understand that you are not a trained doctor/counselor/therapist, so encourage people to get qualified help when they need it. And if you see troubling behavior – for example, someone trying to take advantage of a student who is intoxicated – step in and help.

11. Focus less on the exterior, and more on the interior. Beauty comes in all shapes, sizes, and colors. Kindness, compassion, and wisdom are the best accessories.

12. Don’t be afraid of difference. The world is full of TV shows, talk radio, and other things that just want to polarize and paint people of one race/belief system/political affiliation/sexual orientation/religion/whatever as the bad guy. Truth is, we are all humans and we have to share this planet together. If you only surround yourself with people who look and think like you, you’ll lose the opportunity to learn different viewpoints and the chance to empathize with another person’s experience that is different than yours.

13. Go to lectures, plays, concerts, speaker events, athletic competitions, dances.  Suck as much as you can out of your Wake Forest experience. It will end way sooner than you think.

14. Study abroad if you are able. Consider a place where they speak a different language or have a vastly different culture if you want the biggest personal growth.  But know that even if you go to a country that speaks English, you will still encounter cultural and other differences from life in the US that will stretch your mind and expand your worldview.

15. Take part in meaningful campus ceremonies and activities. That could be the Lovefeast, Hit the Bricks, Project Pumpkin, Wake N’ Shake, Campus Kitchen…you get the idea. Be a part of what is happening around you. And if you see something on this campus that needs to change, don’t just gripe about it, figure out how to roll up your sleeves and be part of the solution.

16. Fall in love at least once while you are here. It’s ok if it ends, is messy, or doesn’t last forever. We learn what we want and need in relationships by being in them and seeing what works for us and what doesn’t. There will likely be many “ex”es before you find “The One.” But love is still worth looking for.

17.  Call. Your. People. Your parents/family members love you and want to hear from you.

Emails from the Office of Residence Life and Housing

The Office of Residence Life and Housing sent its first closing email to all residential students today – read it here.

Additionally, if your Deac is living in University housing next year (including Deacon Place) please review our residential communities’ opening and closing dates as you plan for travel, etc.