Being Present
I am out of the office on PTO, so have preposted content for the end of this week through the Juneteenth holiday. Today’s topic is Being Present for your college student.
I ran across this quote the other day and it reminded me of how people hunger and thirst for the love and affirmation of those closest to them: families, significant others, people they respect. Those are all ways you can show you are being present for your student. 
During the summer, you might be prepping for a family vacation, or trying to take care of all the things your ’26 students need to be ready for college, or getting older kids launched after their college graduation, etc. It could feel at times like we’re running around like chickens with our heads cut off – and even though it’s summer, and we should be relaxing, it may be too much hurry-scurry and not enough enjoying-the-moment with the people you love best.
So let’s push back on the summer pressure, and lean into being present with the people who matter most to you. Unplug from your phone/laptop/tablet and find moments to be fully present with your Deacs (and other children, spouse or partner, etc.). Ask them to do the same.
Being present for each other can also apply to your conversations. Listen (more than talk) to what your students had been doing at school this past year. Ask what matters to them.
If you need help thinking about ways of being present, one good starting point is mindfulness and focusing on the present moment. Our Mindful Wake website has some tips.
And most importantly, say the things that are in your heart to them, the things they might be desperate to hear (but might never tell you):
I love you
I am proud of you
You are a terrific son/daughter/child
I believe in you
You are going to change the world someday
It has been a joy watching you grow up
You don’t have to be perfect – I love you just as you are
It’s OK to fail sometimes. I fail too.
I would be willing to be that your Deacs will remember your being present – kind words, time well spent together, laughter, smiles – as some of their favorite memories.
–– by Betsy Chapman, Ph.D. (’92, MA ’94)